Do the right thing for the wrong reason

Do the right thing for the wrong reason

If you do things for the right reasons, you will get great results. However, if you do the same things for the wrong reasons, you can never be happy with the result. In other words, the why is much more important than the what and the how.

Let's explore some good deeds destined to make you unsatisfied, if done for the wrong reasons:

Helping someone in need. Did they ask for help? What did you expect (without communicating)? And how did you feel when your calendar was not published? Why did you want to help? So that you feel good about yourself and have a clear awareness? Or was your attention alone and selfless for the other, just being there for them without any attachment to a particular result?

I wish someone to be happy. First, how do you know they aren't? Second, do you want their luck for theirs or yours? What is the problem if they were not happy? What does it mean to you? That you fail as a parent, as a child, as a partner or as a friend? Is this really about them or maybe you desperately want to ease your own suffering?

Take a spiritual course. Did you do it just for the experience? Or are you trying to recover yourself, or maybe to get more coping mechanisms so you can better control the world around you?
Do your best to please people. Are you just doing it because? Or try manipulating them to give them their attention, love and approval.

Now ask yourself:

Could it be that your motivation is rooted in fear, control and desire to manipulate (to get something back or to fill an apparent void)? Or do you act for the sake of experience, simply because it feels good and good.

Are you attached to a certain result? Or you just remain committed to the process, regardless of the result.

Do you give or act? Do you get angry when people don't respond in kind? Or do you give nothing unconditionally in return?

Do you act with integrity or are you selfish? Are you trying to look like a saint, but do you feel like the devil?

The test of whether you are doing something for the right reasons is simple. Watch and see how you feel. Are you happy or are you grumpy and resentful? Either way, if you stay happy, your motivation is rooted in unconditional love and acceptance. If you are cranky, your motivation is selfish, manipulative and greedy. Examine yourself carefully realizing that for another reason you can do the same and achieve a completely different result. Explain why the WHY knows that when the WHY is big enough, the HOW takes care of itself.